The Onion Does China

On the humor front — a front we really ought to visit more often, frankly — we would be remiss if we didn’t point you in the direction of The Onion today.

For those not in the know, The Onion is a satirical American news website that posts fake (but funny) news stories. Today, the website appears with the following message from the paper’s publisher:

As the longtime publisher of this news-paper, it is my duty and unrestrained pleasure to announce to you spittle-soaked readers that I have sold The Onion and all of its various holdings to a syndicate of industrious China-men from the deepest heart of the Orient.

The front page is covered in China related stories, which we leave you to explore for yourselves. Personally, my favorite headlines are “NASCAR: Why is it Not Done on Thousands of Bicycles?” and “Yao Ming!” This op-ed piece is also particularly good.

This special China edition has also brought to the surface one of my favorite Onion News Network videos.

0 thoughts on “The Onion Does China”

  1. It really doesnt get any better than the Onion – oh MAN I love irony – its one thing that is so seriously lacking in China —- you know you would just have to through in the odd “harmonious” in this ironic piece and it would pass for news in China..

    “NEW YORK—According to all sources, the People’s Republic of China is strong. The nation is united, the military unmatched, the economy vibrant, and the people ever joyful.

    Similarly correct sources verified that China has always been triumphant.

    In other news, the Chinese government is fair, all-knowing, and wise, propelled by the strength of two billion loyal hands, all pulling together as one under the Great Celestial Bureaucracy high above.

    Experts all agreed that there can be no question of this claim, as this claim is the truth.

    As of press time, the brute and inexpressive English language could not convey the full magnificence of China, nor its excellence in every arena, nor the protective warmth of the red sun that shines forever on its borders, nor the innumerable glories of its Great Leaders.

    New reports also indicate that China will grow stronger yet. 鱼”


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